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Is your life passing you by?

Ashley Mullen
Thursday, 23 June 2011

When do we realize that we've grown, and that life has passed us by? Have we done everything we could to make it the best life possible?

Today, my best friend had a baby. She’s 19 years old. It made me think about how fast I’m growing up myself. I mean…I’m a godmother.

It seems like only yesterday I was turning five years old, and my grandpa sat my 101 Dalmatians cake in front of me, and I blew out all those candle. At one point in my life, it felt like a lifetime ago…but not so much anymore… I mean look at me now! I’ve gone from 2lb 14oz, to 9stone. I’m 5’3” now. I’m a big girl. I have GCSE’s and everything, I’m not in school, I’m looking for my first proper job…how old am I now? I thought that just last week, I was running around the concrete, playing rounders and Kirby with all of my childhood friends. Now I’m all grown up…ready to go on alone. It’s a scary prospect…when I think about being an adult.

I always wanted to be independent…but no, I just wish I was fourteen again. I wish I was at school, with my friends, playing would you rather and laughing at the teachers. I feel like I should be moving out of my parents home, working 9-5 every day, getting married, having children…I feel like I should be doing it all. I shouldn’t be out at night, drinking. I shouldn’t be watching television or on the computer all the time. I should be at my house, my own house, cleaning, and feeding the baby, and making my husbands tea. Do we realize it though? I mean…while it’s all happening.

In the future, when I am married, when I do have children, will I realize that I’m grown up, or will I still feel like a child? Will it take something like that to force me to realize that I make my own decisions now? That I’m legally a responsible adult? Why has it taken my best friend giving birth to make me realize that I am older? Of course, it’s not like I’m 30, living off mum and dad, and claiming benefits. Well, I am claiming jobseekers allowance, but that’s not really the point here.

What does it take for someone to really grow up? Do we need this major even to happen to realize it, or does it just happen?

My mum still cooks all of my meals for me…but I’m an adult. Surely I should do it? My dad still drives me places…but I’m an adult, surely I should be getting my licence? There are all these things attached to growing up, that we don’t understand and don’t know, and there’s not a rule book out there to tell us how to do it. So how do we know when it’s time? It’s time for me now. It’s time for me to grow up now.

I’ve realized that I’m not a child, I’m an adult. I have responsibilities, to my parents, my sisters, my friends, my country and, to myself. I can’t live like a child for the rest of my life. It’s time to take down the posters on my wall (well, we can work on that another time ;) ), it’s time to get a good job, it’s time to start doing things for myself, and take control of my own life. It’s not like I can’t do it, and I know you guys can too.

Life passes you by so fast…and sometimes we don’t realize it…when the day goes too slow, or we’re waiting for a big event…it doesn’t seem like time is going any faster, but it is. I’m turning 19 this summer, and before I know what’s hit me, I’ll be using anti-aging creams, I’ll have my own little walking stick, I’ll be grandma… Savour the time you have, as a child and an adult, because you don’t know when life is going to go by too fast, or when it’ll slow down.

I know that I want to go travelling, and I want to see things. I want to experience things...and I'm going to do it. I'll do whatever I can to make my life a great one, and you should too.

I’m going to leave off here with my favourite Quote. It’s by William Shakespeare, from the play Julius Caesar. I believe that this quote is telling us how important our lives are, and how important it is to take that opportunity whenever it arises, because it may not come again. Don’t turn your back on a fabulous opportunity. In the words of the ever famous Hannah Montana (I’ll admit, I have her albums…) ‘Life’s what you make it, so let’s make it rock.’ “There is a tide in the affairs of men, which taken at the flood, leads on to fortune. Omited, all the voyages of their life is bound in shadows and miseries. On such a full sea are we now afloat, and we must take the current as it serves, or lose our ventures.” ~ Brutus, Julius Caesar.

  • Thursday, 23 June 2011

Comments (3)

  • Tony
    Tony
    23 June 2011 at 11:41 |

    Behind every line and crows foot wrinkles lay the passage of time. Underpinned by wisdom of old. 'tis the present we live. Don't look back nor forward kid. Today is your Gem. Today you squeeze as much into and out of the present. 'tis today that becomes your tomorrow and it'll be your tomorrows you look back and smile, knowing you spent your time wisely.
    ;)

  • Sinitta
    Sinitta
    23 June 2011 at 20:38 |

    hi Ashley,thank you for this article...very thought provoking and well written.
    i have to tell you that i have the same feelings and thoughts even at my age(cough)!
    seriously I look at my children and get dressed for teacher meetings and think 'WHOS LIFE AM I LEADING?!!" it does seem to be happening all too quickly,
    you ARE still very young and cant even vote yet or drink alchohal in America,so dont panic! a job,yes,a good idea and maybe learning to drive,cant your dad teach yu with L plates instead of giving you lifts,let you drive? so long as you are helping out at home and respecting the home and house rules,dont feel bad about being there..still,i think as parents we dread losing our children to the big world out there...but yes,certain events make you realise that life has indeed shifted,,,CONGRATULATIONS GOD MOTHER XX

  • Ashley Mullen
    Ashley Mullen
    02 September 2011 at 21:39 |

    Thanks Tony, for that absolutely lovely, and ever true comment!
    Sinitta, thanks so much! I love to write things like this, I just don't get the opportunity or inspiration very often!
    That's a thought I never thought of, in America, I'm not old enough to do things I do here!
    I'm not learning to drive whenever I can take a lesson :) As for a job, that ones proving more difficult as I have very little experience, but I'm keeping on at it, and applying as much as possible!
    I do help around the house, a lot, and I have been looking at getting a place of my own...and as much as I feel ready, I think it would be a lot more responsible of me to wait until I'm financially stable!
    Thank you so much! My god daughter is the cutest

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